There are sleeping pill. Melatonin. Ambien. Lunestra. Diphemdramine. Sonata. Temazepam. Triazolam.

There are natual sleep aids. Chemical sleep aids. Orgnaic sleep aids.

But nothing has been clinically proven to be more effective at putting you into a deep sleep than watching the Texas Rangers. They’re boring. It’s a boring baseball team playing boring baseball, night after night. 

They struggle to put the ball in play. But when they do, they struggle to hit the ball far enough away from the opposing defensive players for a base hit. But when they do, they struggle stringing together hits. But when they do, they struggle generating any sort of offense that can score runs.

So, they end up leaving runners stranded. Popping up. Striking out. Grounding into double plays. Squandering opportunities. Seeming going through the motions but realluy just going through the same rut over and over again.

Going down in order. One, two, three. Inning after inning. Game after game. Generating so little offense. Scoring so few runs.

It’s sleep-inducing baseball. You don’t need a prescription for it. Just a TV or radio. And they have no prescription to prevent it. Just an undisciplined approach to hitting.

So, if you’re having trouble sleeping, tune into the Texas Rangers game tonight at 7:05. You’ll be sleeping like a baby by 7:30. 

This team is boring. 

*****